Courtesy: Naija
Over the past year I’ve been much more
open to getting into a relationship with a
girl I like, but unfortunately I can’t tame the
dog inside me that wants to fuck a new girl
every other week. So my current game
strategy is to get a girl-next-door type who
isn’t a club rat and treats me well and then
return the favor by taking her out,
pleasuring her, and caring for her when she
has the sniffles. During that time I lie and
creep on the side with random girls.
Obviously I don’t think cheating on a
girlfriend is morally wrong, but I do think
it’s wrong to bang your girl without a
condom and then creep without because
you’re exposing her to diseases that could
create an uncomfortable situation. But
besides that I feel very little guilt when I
cheat because my main girl will never know.
I keep it locked down so tightly that it
would take a lottery chance event to get
me. The result is I get to fulfill my perverse
needs while having something stable with a
girl that I care for. That’s win-win… unless
she finds out. Here’s what I do to make sure
that doesn’t happen:
1. Get started on the right foot. Do not get
into that pattern where you must talk on the
phone every day. To accomplish this you’ll
have to state that you need your “space”
early in the relationship, that you don’t
want it to get into that friendly boring zone
where you’re talking about what time you
woke up and what you had for lunch. She’ll
honor your request but slip and send
frequent text messages, which is fine—it’s
easy to creep with another girl when all you
gotta do is send texts.
Also, if you want to actually have the ability
to cheat, you need time not only to meet
other girls but to take them out on dates.
This means you want to get into no more
than a twice-a-week date pattern with your
girl, one date on the weekday and one on
the weekend. Resist her efforts to see you
more by saying again you need space and
are the loner type that feels smothered
easily.
2. Don’t give her access to your phone or
computer. This is how 90% of guys get
caught cheating. They left their phone
laying around, unlocked, and the girl finds
incriminating text messages. It’s easy to
brush off female numbers in your phone as
old, but not a text message stamped
yesterday where you confirmed fresh plans.
Either delete the text messages manually
before you see her or lock your keypad. Fail
to do either and you will get busted
eventually, guaranteed. Girls are savvy with
cell phones and only need sixty seconds to
sift through your messages or call history.
I’ve caught two girls messing around with
my phone. Once I went to go wash my cock
after sex and came back with my phone on
the floor instead of the nightstand. I guess
she panicked when she heard I was finished
with washing my cock and threw it on the
floor. The other time I spent the night at
this Brazilian girl’s house and woke up in
the morning with all my clothes gone. I
walked around her place dazed and naked,
wondering if I just got got, and found her
sitting on the bathroom toilet going through
all my shit.
For your computer, log off your email
account when you know she’s coming over
and then launch a different browser that you
never use. While it would take time for her
to sift through emails if you slip to the
bathroom, girls go straight to the Sent
folder to gather evidence. I’m certain that
the female species plays dumb with gadgets
and computers on purpose so that we leave
our things laying around. Also lock down
anything else that could get you in trouble
like Skype (call history) and the secret
pick-up blog you operate.
3. Don’t create a lasting impression with her
friends. While some guys will argue that a
way to win a girl is through her friends, I
only find that to be the case with very
young girls around college age—once she’s
in her mid-20′s she doesn’t seek as much
approval from her friends as before. If you’re
meeting her friends for the first time then
show up in an outfit you never wear and
also a slightly different hair or beard
configuration. You don’t need to wear a
disguise but appear a little differently.
The reason is that her friends are spies and
when you’re creeping they may spot you
and then immediately rat you out. By
looking different and not making an
impression, the goal here is they don’t
recognize you when you’re creeping. It also
offers a layer of plausible deniability
because you can say that you were
experimenting with a new look when you
met them and they probably confused you
for someone else. Furiously deny it was you
that they witnessed making out with
another girl. You have no other choice, not
matter how obvious it was you. Be like the
United States government where photo or
video evidence is required to pursue torture
charges.
4. Do not mix dating venues. You want to
have two parallel sets of venues to
minimize cross contamination. If you take
your girlfriend to the same bar as your creep
girls, a bartender or regular may
accidentally out you, or tip her off while
you’re in the bathroom. We all know those
don’t-date-him girls who’s life mission it is
to warn other women of cheating men.
5. Don’t frequent her regular spots. This
doesn’t need to be said but there is an
exception: when one of her spots is a place
you can get laid like a champ.
In Rio there is a club where, as of this
writing, I have a 33% bang rate. This means
every three times I’ve went, I banged a girl.
There’s no way I’m going to stop going to a
place like that, but the success I had at this
club could easily lead to my doom.
Here’s how I have avoided problems: I’d go
without telling my girl and for the first hour
I’d be diligent about scanning the room for
her or her friends. As the night went on,
and the chances of her coming was
reduced, I’d ramp up my game and start
touching girls and going for kisses. If I
know my girl likes going to the place at 1am
and it’s 2:30am and there’s no sign of her, I
can get sloppy without any fear. Of course I
always scan, a pretty paranoid way to mack,
but that’s what it takes to not get caught
cheating.
6. Pick a friend who will be your go-to
excuse for why you can’t hang out with her.
It’s best she has met the friend but I’ve
invented guys as well. Be consistent and
have him be the excuse whenever you
didn’t want to hang with her. Examples:
“Friday I’m hanging out with Steve but how
about Saturday?”
“Steve wants to go to Sushi on Tuesday
night to talk about some girl problems so
let’s do movie night on Wednesday.”
“Sorry I didn’t answer I actually hung out
with Steve in this lame club and didn’t hear
the phone ring.”
Never allow her to join you with Steve,
explaining that he doesn’t like being the
third wheel. Add that you need guy time to
do some male bonding, to talk trash and
just be men.
What’s going to happen is she will develop
a deep hatred for Steve because she thinks
he’s keeping you away from her. That’s not
a bad thing because Steve will be the
channel for her hate. Feel free to milk this
by making it seem like Steve has an
influence over you since he’s “cool” and
“fun.” Many of my friends in D.C. would use
me as their Steve and I can tell you that a
dozen girls still hate my guts because of it.
7. Be mindful of when you blow your load. If
your girl expects a gallon of cum on her face
when you bang, and then this one time
have a trickle because you just got done
banging another girl, warning signs are
going to go off in her head. Therefore
regulate your horniness and sperm quantity.
If you know it takes two days to recharge
after a lengthy sex episode, then allow that
much time before banging a mistress and
then your girl. This is why when it comes to
the weekend I always try to put my girl on
Friday. If I bang another girl on Friday then I
will show up in her bedroom on Saturday
already sated and she will pick up on it.
8. Try to bang your mistresses at their
places. You don’t want her to leave
something behind like a bobby pin, unique
perfume scent, or blood. Also realize that a
girl can tell the difference between a strand
of her hair that is hers and one that is only
5% different. If you have to bang a mistress
in your place then commit yourself to a CSI-
like clean sweep afterwards. Do not get lazy
at this step. View your room from many
different angles, get on your knees, and go
sniffing around everywhere. Flush used
condoms down the toilet and put the
wrappers deep in the kitchen trash can.
9. Construct and rehearse your alibi.
Anticipate what questions your girl is going
to ask and have simple, quick answers to
them. For example say you went out on a
Thursday night after telling your girl you’d
stay in. You met a girl in the club who bit
the hell out of your neck in the heat of
passion. You brought her home and she
turned out to be a flooder. The sheets were
destroyed.
Let’s focus on each aspect of the situation.
If she asks why you didn’t answer the
phone or call her back, say you wanted to
stay in but Steve called and begged you to
go out because he’s trying to get this girl
that has an ugly friend. So for most of the
night you had to talk to a fatty, but you
wished you were with her instead. The club
was so loud that you didn’t see the call and
by the time you noticed it was too late to
call back.
Second, the scratch on the back of your
neck happened when you were in the
kitchen. You left a cabinet door open and
when you reached down to pick something
up off the floor, you come back up right
under it and caught your neck. Of course
you will wear a collared shirt to cover it up
and prevent her discovery, but if you never
wear collared shirts around her then she
will be even more suspicious if she catches
the scratch. If you have a sister and can
borrow her makeup this may also be a good
play, or just go to the nearest department
store’s cosmetic counter. I’m not joking.
Third, the sheets. In America you can do a
wash and dry load quickly, but in countries
without a dryer it has to hang for quite a
while. If she insists on coming in during the
late afternoon before it dries, say how mad
you are at the maid for dicking around and
always coming in on the wrong days.
You’ve closed the gaps. Otherwise it would
be a very damaging situation. While
subconsciously she will know something is
going on and be moody and testy,
consciously she will accept your airtight
alibi and things can proceed as normal.
10. Don’t let guilt change your routine. After
a successful creep you’ll probably feel
guilty for cheating on such a nice girl.
You’ll then feel compelled to make a
surprise phone call, be more affectionate or
loving, or even buy her something small like
a chocolate truffle or rose. Resist this urge
and proceed with your normal routine
because girls can sense when you’re doing
something out of the ordinary. She’ll know
that you are trying to relieve your guilt, and
while she may not automatically assume it’s
from cheating, she’ll know you did
something wrong.
When you get good at cheating, you also
get good at identifying cheating along with
the precursors of cheating, like when she
meets another guy that she’s attracted to.
In due time you’ll be able to piece together
storylines.
For example let’s take a look at
this following hypothetical situation:
Friday: Your Brazilian girl texts you from a
party, says there are “a lot of gringos.”
Stays there late.
Saturday: You send her a text at 6pm but
she waits three hours before replying that
she was “sleeping.”
Following Friday: She says she’ll be busy
Saturday, but doesn’t say with whom. Even
though it’s easier to say “I’m going out with
Stevie,” some girls have trouble lying.
Saturday night: She says she is free.
Likely Story: She met a gringo on the first
Friday and he asked her to a coffee date or
drink early Saturday evening. There he told
her to keep the following Saturday free but
eventually flaked on her. This means she’s
actively looking for better. Either you step
up and offer more of her core needs
(without being needy about it of course), or
you can say fuck it, get a couple more
bangs, and move onto another girl.
Besides concrete evidence like a text
message, email, or hair clip, your girl will
never have 100% solid proof against you. By
being an accomplished liar, avoiding sloppy
moves, and covering holes that develop, it
becomes very close to impossible for her to
catch you. All this so you can have your
cake and eat it too. I think it’s a good way
for a man to live, but if your ass gets caught
don’t blame me.
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