10 Characteristics Of Friendships That Lasts

Characteristics of Long-Lasting Friendships That Keep

1. Steadfast support. My friends support me when I am down, when I am lost, when I struggle, and also when I succeed. You can call the friends you keep for help and they expect nothing in return.

2. You celebrate each other’s successes. The friends you keep unselfishly celebrate your successes. They are equally excited or even more thrilled about your triumphs than you are. You are not jealous of each other’s accomplishments.

3. You can laugh at any situation no matter how tragic, frustrating or confusing. Recently, I went to be with my dear friend who had just lost her husband in a tragic accident. I told her, “Don’t worry, you will not be alone. I will marry you!” She exhaled a deep belly laugh and we had a much needed laugh together amidst the sadness.

4. The bond never dies. Physical distance prevents me from seeing many friends on a regular basis. Months or years can pass, but when we see each other, it is like no time has passed at all.

5. You clear space with each other when needed. You are honest with each other. If something hurts you or bothers you, you have the courage to clear that away with one another, and create new space for your friendship to flourish.

6. You let go of some friendships. Just like romantic relationships, friendships can become stagnant or unhealthy too. Or, you can simply grow-apart. You have the courage to “break-up” with this friend. Or if the relationship naturally fizzles, you release yourself from feeling guilty about it. You accept that you can’t keep every friend that you have ever had. And letting go of friends that you have had throughout your lifetime, gives way to a greater capacity to keep your current and future friendships.

7. You forgive. You forgive when your friend doesn’t have the capacity to ask for forgiveness.

8. Boundaries. Every relationship needs boundaries to flourish. If your friend is going through a difficult time that triggers something painful for you, you still support them. You just tell them that you have to support them with some distance.

9. You drop everything and just show-up when you need each other. A friend calls you crying over a breakup or getting laid off at work, you drop your plans that night, and have a girl’s night in instead. A tragedy happens and you just simply show-up with your physical and/or emotional presence. You don’t just text or email, you pick up the phone and call. You show-up for them in-person when you can.

10. The friends you keep form friendships with the other friends you keep. My favorite place that this happens is at weddings. I have gone to weddings solo, shared a room with the bride’s friends, and we have become immediate and fast friends.